Things You, Unfortunately, Might Hear this Thanksgiving

18 Nov

“We’ve got to get to Wal-Mart by eight, tonight! It’s 65% off tramplings!”

“Had enough of football? There’s still plenty to do this Thanksgiving. Head to the nature center for an in-depth lecture on turkey vocalizations. Or, check out the library’s program on the history of stuffing.”

“Black Friday shopping, huh? Oh sure, go buy a new TV. It’s not like I’ve been elbow-deep in the business end of a turkey, preparing your feast for the last two hours!”

“Your Christmas decorations look lovely.”

“Guys, the tofurkey’s ready!”

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