(TV commercial for Ancestry.com. Different kinds of people stand and talk about their discoveries: a chipper lady named Christina, a man named Michael, and a guy named Pete. Their names are printed on the screen while they speak.)
CHRISTINA: I went on Ancestry.com to learn more about more about my heritage.
MICHAEL: I wanted to discover stories about my ancestors.
PETE: Who wouldn’t want to know more about their history?
CHRISTINA: So, I did a little digging, and what I find out was amazing.
MICHAEL: You’ll never guess what I found out on Ancestry.com
PETE: What I found … surprised me.
CHRISTINA: Turns out, my great-great-grandmother was a Suffragette!
MICHAEL: My grandfather played stickball with Jackie Robinson!
PETE: I’m pretty sure my grandmother was a hooker.
CHRISTINA: She marched with Susan B. Anthony for my right to vote. How great is that?
MICHAEL: Jackie Robinson took my grandpa into the Dodgers clubhouse and introduced him to the whole team!
PETE: Her husband sold recalled toys and illegal fireworks to children. He was blamed for four maimings.
CHRISTINA: It’s just such an inspiration. I’m going to dedicate myself to fighting for women’s rights.
MICHAEL: I’m a huge baseball fan. I can’t wait to tell this story to all my buddies at the game.
PETE: I’m pretty sure they were Nazi sympathizers. Like, really sympathetic.
CHRISTINA: I never would have learned this if I hadn’t signed up. Thank you, Ancestry.com.
MICHAEL: I’m so happy to have learned this story. Thanks Ancestry.com.
PETE: Um, thanks Ancestry.com?
The Lighter Side of the Moon 