A Sixth Grade Girl’s First Month on Facebook

14 Feb

Day 1: Sabrina Johnston joins Facebook.
Comments:
Tanya Goldfarb OMGGGGGGGGG!!!!! Sabrinies finalyyyyyyy got on Faceboooooooook!!!!!!!! Heart u gurrrrrrrrrrl!!!

Day 4: First photo album, entitled “Mittens”. 162 pictures of her cat, Mittens.
Comments:
Jenna Lubavitz LMAO!!!1!! Your cat is totes adorbs bedorbs! Love ya sabrina!

Day 7: New profile picture.
Comments:
Rebecca Christianson Slovensky OMFFFG! This prof pic is gorg! Youre stunning! Work it babe!!!!
Sabrina Johnston Delete this ahora!! I look gross. FML, im so disgusting!!

Day 11: Starts using “Friendly Questions”. Sends approximately 12 notifications daily to friends.

Day 21: Makes fake profile for substitute teacher “Mildred MacCunnen”. First status from fake profile reads, “hi, im mildred and I def pick my nose and sleep during period 2 pre-algebra!”
Comments:
Jenna Lubavitz hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhhhahaaa 😀 can’t believe u made this! youre so frickin hilarius sabrinie!! 😉

Day 30: Facebook account deleted due to failing grades in 3 classes. Teachers suspect FarmVille.

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